'A/N:' Haidere, Moon here. Lol, I did it again. Even though last time I joined a bunch of contests, then had to drop out because I ran out of time, I'm joining a ton of contests again. Okay, two. Still, that's a lot! Well, sorta two. Rainy's has so much time, and my story for Icy's is coming along pretty well... ANYWAY! This is for Rainy's contest! I hope you enjoy!
I never wanted to be a Clan cat. I had always wished I had been born a loner, or even a rogue. Just anything but a Clan cat. Well, no, not anything. I wouldn't want to be a kittypet. But aside from that, anything.
Yet, despite all the temptations, the longings to leave, I never did. It's not like I didn't have the opportunity, there were plenty of those. My mentor and I didn't really get along, so I spent most of my time out in the woods hunting alone. Anyone of those trips, I could've just left. No big deal. The Clan would probably assume I had been killed, if they even noticed my disappearance.
But I never did. Often, I would stand at the edge of the forest, gazing out into unoccupied territory, away from the reach of the Clans. The horizen would tug at me, urging me to leave, and never return. And still, I stayed.
The reason was simple enough: I couldn't leave. That is, I could leave behind a cat. Deep down, I knew this, although I pretended I didn't. Even to myself, I couldn't admit what I say as a weakness. Though at the same time, I didn't consider it a weakness.
Yeah, my feelings are complicated.
So I stayed in the Clan, completely miserable, staying for one cat, and yet neither telling her, nor admitting it to myself. Not exactly what I wanted. None of it.