Daisy is gone! SO, what will happen?
Day Two, Live Show
Tigerstar: Guys, as a prezzie for getting to day two, you have a wii!
Jayfeather: Me and Brambleclaw first!
Brambleclaw: What games do we have?
Jayfeather: Let's play Super Mario Bros!
Jayfeather: Okay, I've got it set up!
(Brambleclaw and Jayfeather start the game)
Jayfeather: Hey, I hit a box!
Brambleclaw: WE GOT YOSHIS TO RIDE ON!
Jayfeather: YAY!! EPIC YOSHIS!
Brambleclaw: NUUUUUUU!! I FELL OF MY EPIC YOSHI!
Jayfeather: So did I!
Brambleclaw: Here lies the Epic Yoshis, who we well and truly love. *cries*
Firestar: (teleports to IATC:GMOOH! camp) Guys, its time for the Bushtucker Trial! And Tigerstar's coming too!
Tigerstar: *evil laugh* Lets get this partaaay started!
Day Two, Bushtucker Trial
Graystripe: This week, you have to put on a talent show. Maximum group 3 cats.
Tigerstar: Please welcome your judges, ME, BROKENSTAR AND HAWKFROST!
Everyone: NUUUUU!!! DARK FOREST EVIL PEOPLE!
Firestar: We are not needed for this Bushtucker Trial, so we're hopping off. (Two Yoshis, one grey and one orange appear magically and Graystripe and Firestar run away on them)
Brambleclaw and Jayfeather: NUUUUUUU!! EPIC YOSHIS!!
Lionheart: Dudes... You do know that Yoshis don't exist, they're just a fragment of your imagination.
Tigerstar: (Puts hands together like Mr Burns from The Simpsons) Excellent... I want lots of Sound of Music in this show.... Hawkfrost, Brokenstar, tutus??
(Brokenstar and Hawkfrost both put on tutus, Brokenstar's green and Hawkfrost's baby blue)
Tigerstar: (whips out pink tutu) Now everyone, PREPARE YOUR ACTS!! The cat, or cats with the highest judges score get IMMUNITY! The others are up for nominations.
(Sandstorm, Brightheat and Leafpool have formed a girl band)
Sandstorm: We should sing Spice Girls!
Leafpool and Brightheart: Yeah!
Leafpool: I'm Posh!
Brightheart: No, I am!!
Leafpool: You love Niall Horany, Niall baby!
Brightheart: (blushes furiously) Do not!
Leafpool: Then how do you explain all the posters in your nest?
Sandstorm: Cut it out girls! Neither of you will be Victoria! I'll be Ginger, Leafpool'l be Baby, and Brightheart will be Scary.
Brightheart: I'm not that scary!
Lionheart: I'm doing magic!
Jayfeather: I'm a Simpsons impressions!
Ivypool; I'm singing Adele!
(Brambleclaw, Cloudtail and Bumblestripe have formed a ballet squad)
Cloudtail: Let's dance The Hills Are Alive!
Brambleclaw: I got an idea! (Does amazing dance moves)
Bumblestripe: We'll all copy you! Plus, since we're singing Sound of Music, Tigerstar will give us bonus points!
Tigerstar: TIME UP! Us judges will give you feedback, and if we hate your performance, we will buzz using our buzzers! First, THE AMAZING LIONHEART!
Lionheart: (In a cape, hat and carrying a wand) Welcome! I am the AMAZING LIONHEART! My first trick.... Tigerstar, what is your dream??
Tigerstar: To be in THE SOUND OF MUSIC!!! CAN YOU MAKE THAT HAPPEN??
Lionheart: No. But, I can bring Julie Andrews on stage, RIGHT NOW!! *waves wand*
Julie: (appears in a poof of smoke) Tigerstar! I am here to improve your ballet skills!
Tigerstar: (claps hands like small child) REALLY!? START NOW!! :DDDDDDDD
Lionheart: (smugly) Come up stage, Tigerstar>
Julie: Tigerstar, show me your Swan Lake dance.
Tigerstar: (does some superbly graceful ballet) *puffing* Am I any good?
Julie: You need to ELONGATE your arms more, and your legs.
Lionheart: (taps foot) Seeming as I'm getting zero attention, I shall now make Julie dissapear!
Tigerstar: AWWW!! Right, comments.
Hawkfrost: I can't belive Julie Andrews stood on this stage! :D Lionheart, though I am a Dark Forest verified member, I LOVE YOU! An 8 from me!
Brokenstar: Honey, you are one KICK ASS competitor! Amazeballs! Plus, you look totally cute in that cape and hat!
A 7.5 from me!
Hawkfrost: Um, Brokenstar, since when did you talk like a really camp cat?
Brokenstar: Um, yesterdat, babes! Get it RIGHT!
Tigerstar: Weird! So, since I am a MASSIVE Sound of Music fan, you get a 10!!! LIONHEART, MORE!
1ST LIONHEART 25.5
Hawkfrost: Next, JAYHOMER!
Brokenstar: Darling, that was, like, a totally amazing d'oh!
Tigerstar: So, JayHomer, where do you come from?
Jayfeather: Warrriors world! :D
Hawfrost: Well, duh!
Jayfeather: (in the voice of Barney Gumball) Hey, Hawkfrost, can you geme to Moe's?
Hawkfrost: HAH! No, but do I get a free Moe's beer?
Jayfeather: (in the voice of Moe Sislack) Yeah, sure. Here's yer beer. (hands Hawkfrost a giant glass of beer)
Hawkfrost: I LOVE YOU MOE!
Jayfeather: No problem. (In the style of Disco Stu) Disco Stu, Disco Stu. Disco Stu likes to disco.
Hawkfrost: My opinion: AMAZING! Plus, I got a free beer! So, its a 9.5!
Brokenstar: Hawkfrost, babes, when did cats drink beer? I must be totally stuck in the original Warriors arc. Jayfeather, you are an UH-MAY-ZING Simpsons impressionist! 7.5 from me.
Tigerstar: Totally original. Its a million percent yes from me! 8!
Simon Cowell: Hey, a million percent yes is MY catchphrase!
Jayfeather: I'll take care of him... (shoves Simon offstage)
Note from Helloitsmeguys: If you have absolutley no idea what JayHomer is talking about, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? Watch some Simpsons episodes!
1ST LIONHEART 25.5
2ND JAYFEATHER 25
Brokenstar: Sandstorm, Leafpool and Brightheart, your turn babes!
X Factor Voiceman: PURLEASE WELCOME.... THE SPICE QUEENS!
(Leafpool, Sandstorm and Brightheart all enter the stage in Union Jack dresses and pink feather boas)
Hawkfrost: I didn't know that she-cats could wear clothes!
Brightheart: Well, we can now. Ladies, you ready?
Leafpool: One, two three.... SHIMMY TO THE LEFT!
Sandstorm & Brightheart: Spice up your life!
Leafpool: SHIMMY TO THE RIGHT!
Sandstorm & Brightheart: Spice up your liiiiife.
Hawfrost: MY EARS! MY EARS! SOMEONE KILL ME! *buzzes buzzer*
Hawkfrost: Not really, you idiot!
Tigerstar: This is AWFUL! *buzzes buzzer*
Brokenstar: Ladies, ladies, HORRIBLE! *buzzes buzzer*
Tigerstar: You got three buzzes, so your out!
Leafpool, Sandstorm and Brightheart: (cluching onto each other sobbing) We were gonna be FAMOUS! At least score us!
Hawkfrost: if you really want ot know, then 2.
Brokenstar: Babes, you totally weren't coola boola! Get a voice coach! 3.
Tigerstar: Someone kill me!
Tigerstar: NOT LITERALLY! Anyway, its a 1 from me.
(These comments just make the she-cats cry even more)
Tigerstar: All this crying is ridiculous! Next!
1ST LIONHEART 25.5
2ND JAYFEATHER 25
3RD THE SPICE QUEENS 6
(Cloudtail, Bumblestripe and Brambleclaw come on in pink leotards)
Brambleclaw: Ow! Mine's too small for me! *cries*
Cloudtail: (through gritted teeth) SHUT UP! Tigerstar will give us a good score if we do well!
Tigerstar: (claps hands together) YAY! Some gorgeeous ballet! What are you dancing to?
Bumblestripe: Um, The Hills are Alive..
Tigerstar: DOUBLE YAY! What are you called again?
Cloudtail: Toms CAN do Ballet!
Brambleclaw: Shall we start?
(The Hills Are Alive starts playing and the toms leap about the dancefloor like swans)
Tigerstar: *crying* Spectacular! I've never seen anything like it!
Bumblestripe: (The music finishes) *out of breath* Well? What did you think?
Hawkfrost: Fabulous! the name serves you right, Toms CAN do ballet! A BIG FAT TEN!
Brokenstar: Babettes, I loved it! But modelling is more my thing so a 9.
Tigerstar: (threatenengly) GIVE A HIGHER SCORE!
Brokenstar: Darling, calm down. 9.5 then.
Tigerstar; AMAZING! I LUV YOU! GIVE ME TICKETS TO YOUR SHOW! 10!!!!
1ST TOMS CAN DO BALLET 29.5
2ND LIONHEART 25.5
3RD JAYFEATHER 25
4TH THE SPICE QUEENS 6
Ivypool: (backstage, talking to Bumblestripe) I don't think I can do this... I'm so nervous!
Bumblestripe: You'll be amazing! Don't worry!
Tigerstar: Ivypool! Come onstage now!
Ivypool: Wish me luck! (walks onstage)
Brokenstar: Babes, what will you be doing?
Ivypool: (nervously) Um, I'm singing Adele's Someone Like You.
Cloudtail: (snorts) She'll never beat our ballet!
Hawkfrost: Take it away!
(There is an agonizing 10 second wait. Then Ivypool breaks into song)
Ivypool: I heard that you've, settled down and you've, found girl and you're, married now...
Tigerstar, Hawkfrost and Brokenstar: *sobbing* She's got such an amazing voice!
Ivypool: (gaining confidence) never mind I'll find, someone like yoooooooouu, I wish nothing but the best, for yooou, too.
Brambleclaw: (crying like mad) Amazing, Just amazing.
(The performance finishes and even Sandstorm is crying)
Hawkfrost: Oh Ivypool... As my Dark Forest apprentice, I never dreamed you'd sing like that. Its a ten!
Brokenstar: Babes...Fantastic. Incredible. I LOVE YOU! (starts crying again)
Tigerstar: (still in tears) Omigod....Ten...BWAHAHHAHA... SOBSOBS!
1ST IVYPOOL 30
2ND TOMS CAN DO BALLET 29.5
3RD LIONHEART 25.5
4TH JAYFEATHER 25
5TH THE SPICE QUEENS 9
Cloudtail: (jaw drops) We got beaten by a girl! *mauls Ivypool*
(evryone starts mauling each other for no reason)
Tigerstar: Guys, guys, break it up. For winning this trial, Ivypool gets a prize. And this week she recieves....A big packet of marshmallows and a chance to have your cover recorded at the studio! Amazing, no?
Ivypool: OMSC! That is sooo awesome! GIMMIE THE MARSHMALLOWS! (gets marshmallows and teleports to recording studio)
Rihanna: (recording in studio) Hey, Ives, babes. What's up!
Ivypool: (jaw drops) RIHANNA!?
Tigerstar: Oh yeah, and you get a free Rihanna poster too!
Rihanna: So, Ives, you wanna duet?
Ivypool: (speechless) My idol.... Um, yeah but I also love jelly beans and marshmallows and Zayn Malik from One Direction and...(babbles on due to nerves)
Rihanna: Let's get this goin' gurl. (Music plays) Oh, yeah...We are cool, yeah
Ivypool: This is Ivypool and Rihannaa.. (beatbox begins) Raptime! Oh yea, Ivyool's ma name, I'll make ya go insane I don't have special powers but I am really marvelous. Ohh yeah.
Tigerstar: This is too emotional! I can't belive that a girl like her is so special! (starts sobbing again)
Day Two, Nominations
(Ivypool teleports back to the ShadowClan forest)
Sandstorm: How was it?
Ivypool: AMAZING! I met Rihanna!
Leafpool & Brightheart: RIHANNA!?!
Ivypool: Yup, the very cat.
Leafpool: I hate you! She's MY idol!
Brightheart: No, she's mine!
Leafpool; IS NOT!
Brightheart: IS TOO!
Firestar: (him and Graystripe bounce back into camp on their epic Yoshis) Ladies, break it up.
Leafpool: SHUT UP! WE'RE CAT FIGHTING! (claws Firestar's nose)
Firestar: Ow... My nossa! *faints*
Graystripe: AMBULANCE! Brambleclaw, dial 999!
Brambleclaw: How do you do that?
Sandstorm: Use a phone!
Brambeclaw: What's a phone?
Jayfeather: THIS! (points to spider)
Lionheart: Dudes, that's a SPIDER! (whips out spanking new white iPhone) What was the number again?
Bumblestripe: No, that's the AMERICAN police, remember? (snatches Lionheart's phone) It was 992, right? (dialls number)
Guy at end of mobile: Hello, you have reached the RomePizza co. What would you like?
Cloudtail: An ambulance, but first, pizza. I would like a double pepperoni for me, a margharita for Lionheart, a garlic stuffed crust with pepper and cheese for Jayfeather...
Graystripe: Um... Let's have an ad break. *cuts to ads*
Ad voiceover: Are you in a dramatic situation right now?
Ad Voiceover: ....Then diall 992, the RomePizza Co. New this week we have....
Graystripe: How come our producers never give us sensible ads? *mauls producer*
Firestar: So, we're back form the ads, and I have a plaster on my nose.....Again.
Graystripe: Wow, dude....You look ridiculous with that plaster on your n-
Firestar: YES THANK YOU... So, for hurting me, Leafpool gets a punishment.
Graystripe: So, Leafpool. You have to go to the dog kennel and your punishmet is....TALKING TO LOONY PINESTAR ON THE PHONE! *sniggers and hands Leafpool the phone*
Leafpool: Um, hi Pinestar...How's the kittypet life?
Pinestar: DARLING ITS LOOOVELY! DO YOU WANT SOME KITTYPET FOOD? ITS TASTY! AND, YOU SHOULD COME ROUND FOR TEA ONE DAY, THAT WoULD BE NICE YES? (rambles on for two hours)
Leafpool: *shudders* I swear I won't hurt you again, daddy.
Graystripe: Brambleclaw, you nominate first.
Bramblclae: (in the rotting room) I would like to vote for Bumblestripe because I see him as really good competition. Also, I bet his dad votes for him loads.
Graystripe: Hey! (swipes Brambleclaw's nose)
Brambleclaw: I thought we were friends! *cries loads*
Firestar: Brambleclaw, join the Once-Heroes-But-Now-Idiots-With-Plasters-On-Their-Noses Club.
Graystripe: And you forgot to vote for Sandstorm!
(Five minutes and one ambulance later)
Sandstorm: HA! You'e got a plaster on your nose!
Brambleclaw: *cries* This is the worst day of my life.
Graystripe: Cloudtail, to the Rotting Room.
Cloudtail: Okay diddly do.
Firestar: (serious face) Cloudtail, who do you want to leave?
Cloudtail: Looking serious with that plaster on your no-
Firestar: yes, yes, my nose is funny. GET ON WITH IT!
Cloudtail: Yes Uncle. I'm gonna vote for Leafpool because her singing in the Bushtucker Trial was AWFUL!
Graystripe: Bad singing clearly runs in the bloodline...(looks pointedly at Firestar)
Firestar: If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with ma friends!
Firestar: Remember when we used to go to discos during The Darkest Hour?
Graystripe: Oh yeah! I remember my outfit....
Graystripe: WOO! WE BEAT SCOURGE! LET'S PARTAY!
Firestar: Great idea! (gets into hideous all in one with flares and sequins)
Graystripe: Great look! (puts on speedos and grows an afro at the speed of light) Let's go PARTAY!
END OF FLASHBACK
Graystripe: I did love the '80's.....
Graystripe: Leafpool, let's vote! (does hideous '80's disco moves)
Firestar: Who do you want to leav?
Leafpool: Easy. Brightheart beause a) I hate her and b) She ruined our Spice Queens performance.
Graystripe: You were pretty bad....
Graystripe: (quickly) But, um, you do look like Victoria Beckham....
Leafpool: (Applying lipstick in shade kittylicious) Really? *pouts* Well, I'm off on a date with Crowfeather!
Firestar: Be back in 10 minutes!
Firestar: Lionheart, vote!
Lionheart: Well, this week its tricky, but I'm gonna go with Bumblestripe, because he's good competion, an dudes, I wanna WIN!
Graystripe: Lionheart, do you remember that disco in '83 when we beat BloodClan? You came down from StarClan and we BOOGIED!
Lionheart: Aww, man, that was EPIC! That afro you wore was amazing.
Firestar: And remember when flirted with Spottedleaf in front of Sandstorm? HA!
Graystripe: Utter hilarity.
Lionheart: Boy, was she jealous!
Bumblestripe: *coughs* Sorry to interrupt, but I think its my turn to vote?
Graystripe: (comes back form '80's land) Oh yeah. Come in son, and tell Father Graystripe all about it.
Bumblestripe: I am going to nomiate Leafpool because she is always pouting and she thinks she's an amazing singer but really she's AWFUL!
Firestar: Omigod, she is bad, even me as her father says so. And that Crowfeather I do NOT approve of!
Graystripe: (turns away from Firestar) You were just the same with me and Silverstream!
Bumblestripe: *jaw drops* You promised Millie that you wouldn't say her name again!
Firestar: Yeah, She Who Must Not Be Named!
Bumblestripe: That's Harry Potter!
Firestar: WHATEVER! DO NOT SAY HER NAME AGAIN!
Graystripe: Okay, okay, I'm shutting up now...
Firestar: Ivypool, to the Rotting Room.
Ivypool: (still in Rihanna haze) Omigod, her skin is hazel brown, her hair...And I still can't belive she's got back together with Chris Brown....And Graystripe?
Ivypool: SHE LIKES JELLY BEANS AND SO DO I! :D:D:D:D:D:D
Firestar: (exchanges a glance with Graystripe) Um, Ivypool, who do you want to nominate?
Ivypool: .....And she said that she thinks that I'm an amazing singer and all so i said that she was too and-
Graystripe: IVYPOOL, SHUT UP!
Ivypool: What? Oh, voting. I want to get rid of Brightheart because I think that she likes Rihanna more than me!
Graystripe: Hey, Jay! you need to vote. (high fives Jayfeather)
Firestar: Are you and Jayfeather becoming better friends than you and me?
Jayfeather: Nah, we're just bromantic!
Graystripe: So, nominations?
Jayfeather: Easy. Lionheart. Because he's just generally a threat in every way.
Firestar: He is pretty tough.
Graystripe: *eyes glazed* Lionheart....My idol.......
Firestar: Scary Spice, over 'ere.
Brightheart: *burst into tears* I'm not scary! I've just lost one eye, that's all!
Graystripe: (hands her a tissue) There there....
Firestar: Leafpool, who do you want to leave?
Brightheart: Leafpool! She's ruined my life! She thinks she's so cool breaking the warrior code and all and
Graystripe: Brigtheart, do you remember that disco after The Last Hope?
Brightheart: Aw, that was SICK! Me and Cloudtail kissed at moonhigh....(dreams)
Firestar: Brightheart, I am an old cat, dead also. So, please do me a favour and stop talking about your PDA's.
Graystripe: Last up, Sandstorm.
Sandstorm: As always, my vote goes to Brambleclaw!
Firestar: God, his crying is annoying!
Sandstorm: Exactly! But I don't make him cry, he just CRIES FOR NO REASON!
Graystripe: And he's the son of Tigerstar, so he shouldn't be trusted, right?
Firestar & Sandstorm: Totally!
Graystripe: Then why did you make him deputy, Firestar?
Firestar: He didn't cry all the time then! And he was a hero without a plaster on his nose and all the readers of Warriors love him!
Sandstorm: Shame, really. He was the big she-cats hearthrob!
FLASHBACK! (Another one, I'm sorry)
Whitepaw (now Whitewing): He is soooo hot!
Sorreltail: I know! I want to marry him!
Ferncloud: I'm a massive Brambleclaw fan! Look at all my posters!
END OF FLASHBACK
Firestar: So, your votes have been counted and, tonight either BRIGHTHEART
Brightheart: NOOOO! I NEED TO TORTURE LEAFPOOL!
Leafpool: NOOO! I NEED TO TORTURE BRIGHTHEART!
Firestar: or BUMBLESTRIPE will leave!
Graystripe: NOOO! MY LIDDLE BABY!
Firestar: So, let's go disco, down to the disco!
Day Two, Live Results (featuring Tigerstar's Ballet Troupe & Mossy)
The following was suggested by Moss. Thanks to Mossy. LUV YA!
X Factor Voiceman: HELLLOOOOO AND WELCOME TO I'M A THUNDERCLAN CAT: GET ME OUT OF HERE! DAY TWO LIIIIIIIVE RESULTS!
Moss: Hello random peoples!!
Everyone: We are not 'peoples' or 'random'. We were specially selecte-
Helloitsmeguys: Actually, I picked your names out of a hat
Moss: Have a can of toughen up *gives to Brambleclaw*
Snape: Hello imbassiles (<-- is that how you spell it?)
Moss: SNAPEADOODLE!! XD *dies* Heck, Revive me some one!
Ivypool: Ok. *revives Moss*
Moss: I'M BACK! SNAPE, SNAPE WHERE ARE YOU?
Tough Guy #1: Get out!
Moss: *gulps* Um..
Tough Guy #2: Or we'll get you out! (punches fist threatenengly)
Moss: I'm going, I'm going!
Firestar: SO, please welcome to another close results show! The voting lines currently stand at:
Graystripe: So, the first cat definetly through to next week after recieving the least amount of voted to leave...BRIGHTHEART!
Leafpool: That is soooo unfair! I can't belive she got more votes that me! Harrumph.
Firestar: So, before we reveal who is leaving tonight, we have a live performance from Tigerstar's Ballet Troupe!
Cloudtail: (sees Tigerstar in a tutu) HAHAHAHA! OMG, Tigerstar, you like BALLET?????
Cloudtail: God, you look stupid.
Tigerstar:(turns into giant) *mauls everyone* I LIKE BALLET! ME KILL YOU ALL!
Graystripe: Um..Producer, Ad break?
A note from Helloitsmeguys: The extract above was taken from LOL! Warriors Spoofs
Ad voiceover dude: Do you have a hungry tummy?
Graystripe and Firestar: YES!!
Ad voiceover dude: Then call into McKitty's, where this week all of our mouseburgers are HALF PRICE! *whispers* WARNING: May lead to stroke and heart attack.
Another note from Helloitsmeguys(sorry!): McKitty'a is the invention of Tangle. Thanks Tangle!
Firestar: Oookay, welcome back to the LIIIVE RESULTS! So, we're about to find out who is leaving ShadowClan territory for good.
(Bumblestripe and Leafpool both look nervous)
Graystripe: The cat leaving is... NO!!!! THIS CAN'T BE RIGHT! Um...Leafpool, you're leaving.
Producer: *coughs* Graystripe...
Graystripe: Fine, fine....BUMBLESTRIPE BABY! YOU'VE GODDA LEAVE!
Bumblestripe: (in shock) What did the lines look like?
Graystripe: MY BABY BOY!*cries*
Firestar: Um,Bumblestripe, you must leave now. Bye!
Bumblestripe: Bye guys! (leaves)
So, what will happen now? Read I'm a ThunderClan Cat: Get Me Out of Here! (Day Three)