Hey everyone, I would really like some constructive criticism if it is possible. Hope you enjoy Darkness Will Shine Light.
ThunderClan
Leader
Acornstar- a brown muscular tom with amber eyes
Deputy
Lightningpelt-a pale ginger tom with bright blue eyes
Medicine Cat
Florafur- tortishell she cat with amber eyes
Warriors
Stormtail- blue she cat with green eyes
Smokestorm- black tom with a white sock
Apprentice: Ashpaw
Greyfang- grey tom with green eyes
Oakpool- brown she cat with unusual stripes
Apprentice: Whitepaw
Skyclaw- white tom with huge green eyes
Redpoppy-brown she cat with amber eyes
Goosefeather- pale ginger tom with a white patch around his eyes
Scarface- black tom with an unusual scar on his face
Cindertail- grey she cat with blue eyes
Breezepelt- blue she cat with blue eyes
Maplemist- dark ginger she cat
Apprentices
Whitepaw-white tom with green eyes
Ashpaw-black she cat with green eyes
Queens
Flowerheart- tortishell she cat with dark green eyes
Elders
Hawkfoot- pale brown tom
Mothtail- brown she cat with amber eyes
Prologue
It was dark. Nothing stirred except the rustle of the leaves in the wind. “Thanks for coming” said a mysterious brown tom. “This better be good” exclaimed the other with a pelt as bright as the sun. “I need more territory we are so limited.” the brown tom said. They sat in silence for a minute staring up at Starclan. “Well we do need more prey.” the ginger tom answered. “Well it is a deal.” said the brown tom. “But would Starclan approve of this?” Asked the ginger tom. “StarClan trusts us otherwise we wouldn’t be in our position now.” Said the brown tom. “That is true,” said the ginger tom “Then it is a deal.” “You mustn’t tell anyone about this meeting tonight.” exclaimed the brown tom “Okay” said the ginger tom. They both padded off. The brown tom padded off. He thought what his mate would think, what would his kit think and most importantly his clan if they found out what he was doing. “But they wouldn’t, I will never tell anyone about this deal” he thought. Then it turned dark. A cloud covered the sky and it started to rain. “Is this a sign from Starclan?” He thought. He sprinted back to camp. He stood on Highrock and thought to himself “I am Acornstar and I am the leader of ThunderClan, and I would do anything for my clan.”