Talk:It’s Time (Night Visions songfic)/@comment-8248793-20141011175705

SPOILERS

This one was a bit more confusing than the first two, but I didn't feel as though the plotline was rushed.

I feel as though you've plucked random cats, and stuck them into the story for MeadowClan. I have absolutely no clue where you found all these warriors, and I think you should have explained more about that.

"Finchpaw, who was chewing some meat, laughed and the meat sprayed all over the ground." That's a really disturbing image XD I would have just stated that he laughed, instead of putting an image that was probably not necessary for the scene.

Other than all that, you did very well with Flamegaze's doubt about what she should do, but I feel as though you've been switching her personalities. try to keep to one, maybe like she's ruthless but nervous, but don't keep giving her new qualities.

Now to be honest, I thought that the ending was perfect. You gave us enough time to ponder over his actions, and the shock of seeing how Flamegaze looked was a perfect cliffhanger. My only problem was that everyone just fled the clearing, just because Flamegaze was standing there.

This was good though! <3

END SPOILERS