Talk:Clan Struggles/@comment-28076378-20170524233220

SPOILERS

You've improved since I last read one of you fanfictions ^^

This looks like it's going to be how some Clans are formed - I'm assuming they'll be called CloudClan, OrchidClan, MoonClan, and SnowClan? Idk. Anyway, I'm just a tiny bit confused with what's going on.

How long ago was it when the cats split up when Chapter One takes place? It seems a little rushed so far, it feels a little hard to grasp what's going on, so perhaps try slowing it down a little. And wouldn't the entire group discuss the topic of moving before Cloud makes up his mind? Unless Cloud's just that sort of leader, then ignore that.

Cloud's group isn't huge, and by the way it sounds, it was way bigger before all the cats spilt up, so why is there not enough food to go around? Are there rogues on the territory, stealing prey or are there too many twolegs..? I'm just curious.

If Cloud and his group move far away enough, maybe they'll see one of his sisters groups (if they moved far, that is) I wonder if they'd become rivals?

There were a couple of spelling errors, here they are:

...."as he came in, he see his three siblings" (change see to saw; Cloud in prologue) ... "A longing look was in here eyes" (Describing Orchid in prologue)... No other caught my eye.

Anyway, this story has a lot of potential and I'd like to see what happens next! Great job!

END SPOILERS