Talk:Arrival/@comment-1839575-20130611122704

Okay, here's my comment, as promised. xD I'll go and comment on Strike Two later, Aussie.

The plot is pretty exciting, and I'm loving that the mastermind behind it all is being kept mostly in the dark - that always makes things more interesting. We're sort of seeing things through the eyes of his minions, which is cool. :D A couple of things I noticed - one, the names. They're kind of... excessively flowery and yeah. I know a lot of the noobs do that, but it still annoys me. Two isn't a complaint, more of an observation that they didn't really need to have that conversation about the kittypet Mudstar had found being female, since all tortoiseshell cats are female. :D Three and four are... I find it a bit hard to relate to Dixie as a main character when she seems sort of... unnessecarily violent. She might possibly be bipolar, because her personality makes dramatic switches between her caring for her kits and her viciously attacking another cat for no apparent reason. Also I'm not sure about her motivations for joining SummerClan?

But apart from those few things, it's going great, Tangle! Keep up the good work. :D