Dying Wish

This is the third book in the Wishspirit Series!

Chapter One
"You never told me about this," I whispered as Wishspirit faced me gently, and I looked down to my paws with deep, rage that was so wild I couldn't even yowl.

"It would cause nothing but harm."

"I had to find out, eventually, though," I whispered, "You told me that several things couldn't be revealed because they would mess with the flow of destiny. But why should that even matter if it has already been ruined?"

"There will always be a destiny," she whispered, "With the old one we ruined, a new one was forced to come along and adapt to the world."

"So what's wrong with ruining this one and making a brand new one? Surely it's not all that bad to just have a new set of prophecies to deliver."

"You don't understand this," I heard a small crack in Wishspirit's voice but I was certainly not in the mood for sympathy with anyone but myself.

"What was the pointing of letting me live if the world I met would be such a wretched one?"

"We didn't know," Wishspirit whispered, "Believe me that if we did we would never have made the regretted choice that we did. I would undo it in a heartbeat."

"So would I," I gently whispered.

We were both silent.

"Is there any way to fix it?" I asked gently.

"No way to repair all the damage that has been done, all the cats that have been killed, and all the things that have been corrupted," she claimed, "But there is a leader of this."

"A leader?" I asked.

"He isn't aware of it, but by being the largest mistake in the world you dwell, he has come to be the leader of all your problems."

"So if I kill him..."

"We could fix whatever possible," Wishspirit nodded.

"Who is this cat?" I felt adrenaline sweeping through my body. If it would be this easy than surely I could just run off into the woods, find them and kill them, not minding what would be sure to follow.

As long as he was dead.

"Sagestar."

I should have guessed. Because just running in there and killing him would not be nearly as easy as I had hoped it might be able to.

He had cats that would kill me before I managed to take Sagestar down, as opposed to after. It would take planning and timing.

"And then everything is better?" I ask her, gently tilting my head, but she is already fading away from me and I can soon feel myself waking beside Hopekit and Dreamkit.

When I gently pull my head off my den, the two kits jump to their paws, and jump onto me, probably letting out a soft squeal of delight.

But I wouldn't know.

I'm deaf.

And just yesterday, before sunset I discovered that I was more. I was more than a useless apprentice who had been banished from their Clan, stuck in a world where nothing seemed right.

I realized that I was a reason.

A reason for it all.

Sagestar, the timing, different creatures in places they don't belong. The reason that after me no apprentices have made it past their first six months.

And I was one of the only two breathing cats who knew.

The other one was Spiritpaw, who was gently paddling towards me as my thoughts raced violently, with gently eyes, not hiding his imminent worry.

"Are you okay?" he asked me, "What I told you last night was a lot to take..."

"I'll make it," I responded, "But there is something important which I think you should know. Something which could fix this all."

"Really?" his eyes widened.

I nodded gently.

"And that is?"

"Killing Sagestar."

I hate myself a little for giving him the answer so quickly, without hesitation or doubt on if he should know it or not, while he brought all of his secrets to me slowly.

If at all.

"Okay, then," his seemed a little startled, "How exactly did you figure this out? Was it a guess or did you get some sort of deep feeling that this is the case?"

"Wishspirit told me," I responded calmly.

"Okay, then," I could tell her was deep in thought and obviously conflicted by the different choices and the consequences they would have, "How are you thinking we should do it?" he asked, gently tipping his head to the side, "Do you just want to run in and take your chances?"

"No," I replied, "Sagestar is too well guarded. We need a proper plan, maybe one that will last a few moons before we can kill him."

He nodded slowly.

"What if we returned to the Clan?" he offered.

"No!" I shrieked, instinctively wrapping my tail around the two kits who were playing cheerfully, oblivious to the serious discussion that was taking place in the same den as them.

"It might be our best shot," he tried to reason.

"What about the kits?" I asked him harshly, "We can't leave them behind here? And SpiritClan kicked me out before. You ran away. I don't think they will be happy to see any of us."

"I don't know," Spiritpaw was silent, "They may let you back."

"They kicked me out," I responded a little frankly.

There was a tense moment, "I've been hiding something from you," Spiritpaw confessed with a shrug, "I don't think it would have made a difference, but I feel a bit guilty now."

"What?" I demanded, completely fed up with secrets.

"Well," he sighed gently, "You were never really kicked out of the Clan?"

"What?" I gave him a surprised glance, "But they kicked me out for not watching Sagestar eating his prey! They even escorted me out of camp!"

"You were punished," he claimed, "But they didn't exile you. They just claimed that until you brought another five pieces of prey for Sagestar you wouldn't be allowed back into the Clan."

"That was delayed," I commented a little dryly.

"Yes," he claimed, "But I don't think you chose to leave. They probably assume you are waiting for a day when you can finally catch that much prey."

"That's great!" I replied, my eyes sparkling a little, "Then I could probably return to the Clan if..." I slowed down, narrowing my eyes, "Are you sure it is worth five pieces of prey?"

"Do you know how much prey Sagestar has stolen from the Clan and is yet to steal before he died which may be seasons from now?" Spiritpaw questioned, "I think this will be nothing compared to the amount of prey that we will be saving for the other cats in the forest."

"Assuming we succeed."

"We will," his eyes glittered with harsh determination I had never seen in them before, even when they followed me while I still remained in SpiritClan.

"I hope so," I sighed.

"Don't lack faith in yourself," he warned me.

"How can I not?" I responded a little glumly, "I am the reason we have to go through all this thought and planning so that we can kill Sagestar."

I pulled into a hunting crouch, and gently let my breathing calm down as I took a couple soft steps towards the mouse. A couple soft moments passed before I leaped through the air.

A second later it was clutched tightly in my jaw.

"Nice catch!" I heard Spiritpaw calling to me and whirled around to see him carrying two rabbits, his mouth at an awkward angle as he struggled to carry them both.

I flicked my tail at him, indicating we should get back to the den where we would drop them off.

We could get two next two later that evening.

But we soon realized there would be no need for that, when the kits bounded up to us, each with a small mouse in their jaws, bounding up and down with excitement.

I stared at the wide-eyes while Spiritpaw grinned at them, giving each a well-deserved lick on the head.

"Who would have thought?" he whispered, as we dumped our prey, beside theirs, adding up to five which was

"They are older than we credit them for," I replied, "Time seems to fly by now that I have left the Clan. I hardly even noticed that they are almost three moons old."

"I know," he nodded.

"I wonder if time will pass as quickly in the Clan," I wondered gently, already feeling a great shadow passing over my heart.

My Clan wasn't my home anymore.

I don't think it ever had been. But maybe, if I gave up the kits, Spiritpaw and the forest I had grown so used to for a moon or so I could make it a home for other cats.

Fixing the mistake that came with being born was my first priority.

"Wishpaw, wake up," I felt a gently paw poking me and looked up to see Spiritpaw. There was a slightly concerned look on his face as he gazed at me.

I pushed myself up to my paws and gazed at him gently, "What's wrong?" I asked, cautiously.

"Are you sure?" he asked me gently, "I know this was my idea and I guess I didn't give you enough time to decide if you really want this or not. I understand that SpiritClan may not be a place where you feel comfortable and I don't want to push you there..." he whispered gently.

"It's fine," I replied gently, brushing my tail over his nose, "Don't worry about me," we met eyes for a split moment, green against blue, white against black.

He sighed.

"I will admire you for doing this the rest of my life, Wishpaw," he gently whispered, his tone a modest one, leaving me blushing gently.

"I didn't really have a choice," I whispered calmly.

"You always have a choice," he replied.

We were still for a moment. And then he gently leaned forward and brushed his muzzle against my cheek, leaving a strange sensation.

Now was not the time to question it, though.

I had agreed to leave before the kits woke up, because we were afraid they may decide to follow me to camp which would end terribly.

I gently paddled up to the kits, who were still sleeping and gave each of them a soft lick on the head. I then turned back to Spiritpaw and our eyes locked for a moment.

Then I lowered my head, stretched my jaws wide, as I placed the two mice on my back and the rest of the prey in my jaw, before turning around and heading out of my den, and to the Clan.

Back to hostile territories.

Chapter Two
I swallowed the large lump in my throat as a faced a gruff warrior, one of Sagestar's guards, his gaze floating over me suspiciously.

He moved his jaw, and I couldn't tell what he was saying. This would be the hardest part of my return to SpiritClan; having cats to talk with, but not being able to talk with them.

I nodded, slowly, not sure what he was saying, but hoping that nodding was the right thing to do. If not, I realized, we may have wasted five pieces of prey.

On Sagestar.

He eyes me suspiciously for a moment, watching my head bob up and down, before emitting a loud sigh, and taking a step aside so that I could pass through.

I hid my smile of victory.

I gently stepped inside the camp, but my spirits deceased as soon as I did. There was a glum air hanging around, and it was all I could do to put one foot in front of another, as opposed to turning around and fleeing.

Small brambles loitered the floor of the camp, and I could see a couple small heads poking out of several dens. Everything seemed the same as when I had left it.

And that was not a good thing.

I let out a gentle sigh as I continued to paddle across the camp towards the apprentice den, which I realized, I probably should have been out of by now.

I just never received the proper training.

I sucked in a deep breath as I reached the apprentice den, doubting the choice I had made, yet again, before forcing myself to swallow my fear and step inside.

The den was fairly empty, as always, and I was the youngest among the apprentices once I entered. There were only two others, and I figured the others were out hunting.

Probably for Sagestar.

It still struck me as odd that I had never come across a cat from the Clan during the time Spiritpaw, the kits, and I rested in the territory.

The only time was when I came to camp in search of the kits.

Both pairs of eyes gently rested on me as I entered. I saw a flash of recognition followed by confusion entering both of them, and I already knew how I would reply to their questions.

With a simple shrug.

But they didn't ask anything, surprisingly as I watched them fiddling with their bedding, and I felt a sharp stab of pity for them.

I hadn't even realized what a blessing it was to live outside SpiritClan.

And now it was gone.

I forced back tears of longing and regret, as my eyes continued to wander around the den. There was nothing quite special about it, except for the gloomy force hanging in the air.

Five seconds into my stay and I already couldn't stand it.

To save me, I feel a gruff head poking into the den and I remember the Clan well enough to know that this means we get to watch Sagestar eating now.

Oh, joy.

I gently pulled myself up to my paws, and followed the two apprentices out of the den, to find that the warriors' den was being emptied too.

I almost gaped in surprise, however, when I saw how few warriors remained.

I began to wonder what happened to the other ones. My greatest guess was that they had starved to death, although I was able to contemplate the chance that they had been exiled, or they had ran away, like Spiritpaw and I, which was probably the best option.

It didn't really matter, though, I reminded myself.

I wasn't here to find out the mystery of the missing Clanmates. I was here to fix what I had started and to save the world from a monster.

I was here to kill Sagestar.

Speaking of the devil...

I gently raised my head to see Sagestar waiting patiently as all the cats gathered around him, and four mouse lied beneath his feet.

I would never understand why he wanted us to watch him eating. It just didn't make any sense. Did he like eating so much that he thought it would lift our spirits to watch him doing it?

But I doubted even Sagestar could be that stupid.

I began to wonder if he was actually doing it to prove the grip he had on the Clan, as opposed to anything else. Maybe he just wanted to show the Clan that he had control over them. So much control that he could ask them to watch him eating and declining would not be an option.

I suppressed a cry of frustration.

Once all the cats had gathered, Sagestar rose to his feet. I expected him to immediately delve for his prey, but instead he turned to us.

And he began to scold us, in obvious frustration.

My mind gently began to twirl as I watched his jaw opening and snapping at each of us in great anger and frustration for reasons I didn't understand.

I gently turned my head away from Sagestar and towards the entrance to camp. The sun was still up so light was scattering through the entrance.

And I met green eyes.

I suddenly felt like my whole past was returning back to me so suddenly, and the dull feeling in my gut told me I certainly wasn't ready to face it.

I gently squeezed my eyes shut.

And when I opened them the eyes were still staring at me. But this time, it didn't feel as horrifying as it had a few moments ago.

Because the eyes actually spoke to me this time.

I could feel them gently tilting to the side as if to ask my what is going on.

I gently shrugged, indicating that I had absolutely no clue.

There was a tense moment of silence before I could feel the tension in the eyes fading and I turned my head back around to face Sagestar.

Who was still scolding the Clan for an unknown reason.

I looked at my former Clanmates trying to find a readable expression in their gazes that might give me a hint as to what was going on, but I could find none.

Finally, the leader took a step back and surveyed each of the cats, letting his gaze run over them, before letting out a sigh, and dismissing us with a flick of his tail.

He didn't even eat!

My mind was whirling and I instinctively headed towards the exit to camp, and once I reached it I broke into a run, following the green eyes.

I felt myself running into another cat and looked up to see Spiritpaw, glancing at me with a confused expression on his face.

"Are you okay?" he asked me.

"No," I replied, deciding against lying to make him feel better, "But I needed to ask you what Sagestar was saying back in camp."

He was silent for a moment.

"Nothing," he finally shrugged, "Sagestar was just being his usual, greedy self."

"But he was saying something," I claimed, "And he didn't even stop to eat. What was going on?" I didn't care if I sounded too pushy.

I was the one who had to return to my former, wretched life.

"He was mad," Spiritpaw shrugged.

"About what?" I responded harshly.

"Prey," he claimed, "He said that the Clan wasn't bringing him enough prey and if they don't start to pay his stomach more they will be punished."

"What?" I gaped involuntarily.

Spiritpaw shrugged, "You know Sagestar."

"We have to hurry," I claimed, "Killing him."

"We need a plan first," Spiritpaw responded.

I was silent for a few moments, "What if we could get the Clan to help us taking him down?" I offered, "I know they all must hate him..."

Spiritpaw nodded, "But you can't speak..." he claimed and we elapsed into silence. He finally sighed, "Why don't you head back to camp, Wishpaw, I will talk to you tomorrow."

I nodded, pulling myself back up to my paws and turning around, back to camp.

I reminded myself that it was he only place I deserved to be.

Because I was the one who made such a mess out of it.

Chapter Three
I pulled into a hunting crouch, as I gently soared through the air, landing nimbly on a mouse and killing it swiftly with my teeth.

I smiled, as I gently placed the mouse in my jaws. Ever since Sagestar scolded the Clan I had realized that it would probably be wise to do some hunting for the rest of my Clanmates, since I had been eating much more than them in the past few moons of my life.

Besides, prey didn't really matter as much to me anymore. After my quick talk with Spiritpaw a few sunsets ago, I hadn't seen him at all.

It was terribly lonely, and I felt left in the dark.

Every night before I went to bed I would think about the kits, pray to StarClan that they were okay and Spiritpaw wasn't struggling with taking care of them.

Sometimes I wondered if it was best that I didn't know, so that I didn't completely ditch the plan to kill Sagestar and make this a better world.

And I figured that sticking around the Clan for a little bit longer was for the best anyways.

Not for me, but for everyone else.

And I owed them, at least that much after everything I stole.