Talk:Pine Frost/@comment-1703139-20140113013944

Wow. I really enjoyed that. The plot is excellent and the ending was really unexpected. I completely expected for Frostpaw to get saved somehow and then the story just...ran out and I was like 'WAIT NO BUT'

Honestly, the thing that bothered me the most was the font. Maybe it's because my eyes are complete crap, but I had to re-read everything like four times. I thought Snakeheart was Smokheart for like, two chapters. There were a few spelling/grammar errors, but I think with another edit you could get all of that out of the way. The prologue was also kind of confusing...I didn't really know where the kits were and where the cats were meeting. But on the other side, it was mysterious enough to make me eager to keep reading.

Okay, I don't know if you meant to do this, but I loved that this wasn't really Pinefrost's story. I mean, sure the thing's named after him and he's the 'hero'. But the story itself is about Snakeheart's quest for revenge and how Shadowfire fell into it. I loved how non-traditional it was and how well developed the characters were. The plot itself was nicely thought of as well.

Good luck in the contest!