Talk:Singularity/@comment-17759525-20170628194411/@comment-17759525-20170704230036

(commenting contest cont'd)

So rather than doing this chapter-by-chapter like I usually do this is just going to be what it is. It didn't feel right to break away from reading every couple of minutes to add to a comment. It ruins the immersion of the story and wouldn't really do it justice anyways.

So first off... this is incredible. I hope you know that. You've created a unique and terrifying monster in the heart of what is usually portrayed as a peaceful and pacifistic Clan. Your descriptions are always spot-on, alternating between beautiful and utterly chilling. I wish I had the talent to write like that.

Each character is so unique, having his/her own voice and place in the world. Strong Ravensong, who was briefly a hero only to melt away before Sageheart's eyes. Sageheart himself, who started out as an underdog but eventually managed to confront his own weakness. I think his name is symbolic in two ways - "sage" can refer to someone who's really wise (though in a Warriors context it's probably just the plant), and he tried so hard to follow his heart even when he hated it. <3

And then there's Dawnpaw. I always had mixed feelings about her. There was that lingering hope that maybe she would pull through and be okay - but then, it wouldn't make for much of a story if that were the case. I find it really interesting that neither she nor Sageheart ever really accepts the name Wisethought for her - it's so silvery and positive and completely unlike her as a character.

Even with the minor characters, though, you give some glimpses into their personalities and thoughts and such. I can't think of a single minor character in this story who doesn't impact it in some significant way, no matter how small.

I tend to think of epilogues as something that wraps up a story after it's already seen its proper ending, but in this case the epilogue is in and of itself the proper ending to the story. It's chilling and heartbreaking and - as weird as it may sound - completely fantastic in its execution.

This isn't nearly enough to summarize a story like this, but for lack of the proper words, all I can say is that you've done an amazing job, and you've created something real and lasting and impactful with this story. <3