Darklion Spoof 2

Lionpaw: Hai there!

Hollypaw: Whatever.

Jaypaw: You have a warrior ceremony today.

Firestar: Gather! Now! Old cats! Lionblaze and Hollyleaf! Bye!

(Firestar unsystematically dies)

Brambleclaw: YAAAAY Firestar is dead!!

Jaypaw: He was a stupid furball.

Brambleclaw: I will be leader now!!!

(Brambleclaw heads to the Moonpool)

(StarClan cats come down)

Random StarClan cat: Nine lives. Bramblestar! HI BRAMBLESTAR!!!!

(Bramblestar goes back to camp)

ThunderClan cats: Bramblestar! Bramblestar!!

Bramblestar: Yo. Graystripe. Be deputy.

Graystripe: YESSS finally the recognition I deserve!!

SpoofDarklion44: Don’t get carried away, Graystripe. Tigerstar is coming in…

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Tigerstar enters the camp and kills Graystripe)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Bramblestar: Ugh, I have to find a new deputy…

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Dovekit and Ivykit are born)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Bramblestar: Hi, kits! Have mentors! Oh, look, Dovewing and Ivy-something-or-another!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Dovewing: Brambestar, you still need a deputy. It’s been a year.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Ivy-something-or-another: I’ll do it! I’ll do it!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Jaypaw: No, Ivy-something-or-another visits Hawkfrost. She loves Hawkfrost. Hawkfrost teaches her to fight, and Brokenstar and Tigerstar direct training sessions, and…

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: Hey, Jaypaw, keep it brief. It’s a spoof, only the narrator is allowed to be long. That’s me. Leafpool, what is wrong with you?! He was supposed to be Jayfeather long before Dovewing and Ivy-something-or-another were born!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Leafpool: All hail Jayfeather.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Leafpool dies)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Bramblestar: That’s the last of Firestar’s direct kin!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Sandstorm and Squirrelpaw: We heard that!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: Squirrelpaw was supposed to be named Squirrelflight at the end of the second series, before Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf were born! Hey, Hollyleaf, you’re supposed to be lost in the tunnels.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Bramblestar shoves Hollyleaf into collapsing tunnels)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: By the way, Jayfeather, Blackstar just found your stick, the one you’re in love with, you know? He broke it into a gazillion pieces.''' '''

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">'''Jayfeather: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! '''

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Squirrelflight and Sandstorm die)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Spottedleaf appears)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Spottedleaf: Bramblestar, Firestar’s direct kin will never die out… the prophecy cats are his direct kin, Cloudtail is, and he has a kit, and she had Dovewing and Ivy-something-or-another, and soon Dovewing will mate with Lionblaze…

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Jayfeather: How come she can talk for a long time?!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: She’s a StarClan cat.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Jayfeather: NO FAIR!!!!!!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Ivy-something-or-another: Can I have another name?

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Bramblestar: Hi there, Ivy-the-annoying-something-or-other-she-cat-that-is-related-to-Firestar.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Ivy-the-annoying-something-or-other-she-cat-that-is-related-to-Firestar: I’ll stick with Ivy-something-or-another…

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Bramblestar: I figured so. Now don’t complain anymore.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Ivy-something-or-another: COMPLAIN COMPLAIN

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Bramblestar kills Ivy-something-or-another)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Dovewing: Ivy-something-or-another! NOOO!!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Brokenstar appears)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Brokenstar: Hey Bramblestar! Yo, dude!! I just checked out your radical book from the library, you know? The one called 247 and a Half Ways to Kill a Villain in 42 Seconds or Less?

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Bramblestar gulps)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Brokenstar: Dude…. It Is…. Like, RADICAL! Dude, great job! I love the section on deathberries, you know, ‘cause it happened to me? Sweet, dude!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Bramblestar sighs in relief)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Brokenstar disappears)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Jayfeather: That was weird. Bramblestar… you KNOW how to WRITE?! What’s a BOOK and a LIBRARY ANYWAY?!?!?!?! BLACKSTAR BROKE MY STICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Jayfeather starts foaming at the mouth)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Lionblaze: Jayfeather! Calm down!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Jayfeather dies of rabies)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Dovewing: Now how will the prophecy work out?!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Lionblaze: I don’t know. I just don’t know.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Cinderkit(heart)is born)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: Cinderheart! You were supposed to be born a LOOONG time ago!!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Cinderheart falls out of a tree)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: And that was supposed to happen in your apprenticeship… wait, if Lionblaze loves Dovewing AND Cinderheart… Bramblestar, have fun killing out Firestar’s kin! Kits will come!!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Dovewing gives birth to Sweetkit, Thistlekit, and Rosekit)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: Those are the names of the kits of… some cats in Bluestar’s Prophecy. I will call them Unknown A and Unknown B.

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Unknown A and Unknown B appear)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">Unknown A: For your information, Dovewing, Sweetpaw, Thistleclaw, and Rosetail belong to us!

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Unknown B snatches the kits)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">(Unknown A and Unknown B disappear)

<p style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">SpoofDarklion44: I love LOVE to control these cats, it’s so unsystematically random!!!