Trial and Error

What happens when you die? Who decides where you go to?

The Council decides.

Spottedleaf
The wounds Clawface inflicted on me fade as soon as I come to. I know I'm dead, but the sight of the cavern I'm in seems so real, I wonder if there's been some mistake. But I know that I'm in some afterlife when there are nine ripplings in the air and nine silvery transparent spirit-cats appear.

The one in the middle, a gray-and-black she-cat raises her head, gray eyes shining. "I am Graydapple."

"I am Emberwing," mews the ginger tom next to her.

"I am Silvernight," the silver tabby meows, his eyes shining.

"I am Ravenfeather," the jet-black tom with some fur tipped with white says.

A tortoiseshell that looks just like me tips her head. "Brindlepelt," she mews.

"Tigerember," the dark tabby rumbles. He looks much like Tigerstar.

"Hawkflame," meows a similar tabby like Tigerember.

"Lightningpaw," a small voice squeaks. It's coming from a small white she-cat with lilac paws and tail-tip. She's not any older than seven moons, and my heart pangs to see her dead.

"Icekit," a voice squeaks, and as I crane my head to see the owner, I spot a half white half silver she-kit, less than three moons old.

"We are the council," Graydapple mews.

"We judge all newcomers whom have died," Emberwing meows, flicking his tail.

"And we give them their punishment or reward, and their afterlife being," Silvernight finishes.

I stare at them in shock, then bow my head in respect. "It is an honor to be speaking to the Council, then."

Ravenfeather smiles, but it's a bit of a sad smile. "Spottedleaf, we ask that you sit at the back of the cavern so that we may see what you have done."

Confused, I trot back a few steps before feeling my tail brush the wall, and I sit.

Icekit trots up to the area where I was before, and to my astonishment, she begins chanting in a language I don't know of. "Chie no kotoba, pawā no kotoba. Watashi ni Spottedleaf no jinsei o hyōji shimasu. Unmei no kotoba, seikatsu no kotoba. Watashi ni Spottedleaf no jinsei o hyōji shimasu.," she chants, and then she traces the outline of a circle before stepping back.

The ground where her paw touched glows a bright white, and the ground ripples before a crystal-clear pond is shining in front of the Council. I stare in astonishment, first at the pool, then at Icekit. At such a young age, she is capable of such magic.

"As a kit, she was kind and caring to her siblings and every cat around her," Graydapple narrates, eyes narrowed as images appear above the pool, showing pictures of me and the then-Redtail and Willowpelt. "She showed a great interest for herbs."

"She became the apprentice of Thrushpelt before asking to become the apprentice of Featherwhisker. Spottedpaw was a diligent and intelligent apprentice." Emberwing takes it up from there as images of my old mentor show, and I feel tears welling in my eyes.

"She helped Bluestar with her kitting along with several other queens before earning her name, Spottedleaf," Silvernight meows. "Greencough struck, and the illness took Featherwhisker's life before she could do anything."

"Stop," I whisper softly. "Please stop." I don't want to go through this. I don't want to relive the memories of my dead mentor, whom I could not save.

They ignore me, and continue.

"She saved lives of the warrior that fought against greencough and the battle with RiverClan, then receiving the prophecy," Ravenfeather mews. "Moons later, she fell at the claws of Clawface." His fur bristled at the name of the scarred tom.

I show no reaction, except more tears. "Please stop. Don't make me relive these moments." In the end, I close my eyes as the images come to show Clawface picking up Frostfur's kits and me standing in his way. There is sound to this, and the only thing I hear is my dying cry as he slashes my throat, my life bleeding out.

Tigerember is the first to speak. "Did she do any wrong?"

"She fell in love with Firepaw," Brindlepelt quietly mews. I feel my pelt beginning to burn. Yes, I fell in love with the ginger tom. I admit it, I did. "She broke the code."

"They never got to be together," Lightningpaw points out. "Perhaps it would've been for the best if she had died."

"How?" I demand, my emotions spilling over me. "Why would being separated by my love be the best?"

"Your punishment wouldn't have been so harsh," Emberwing answers gently. "Breaking the code has severe consequences."

It makes sense. But I am still burning with fury at these cats. They think they know everything!

"Any other?" Tigerember asks. No cat answers.

"Spottedleaf, medicine cat of ThunderClan. Do you admit guilty to any other 'crimes' you may have done?" Graydapple asks. I can think of nothing I have done wrong.

"I have only fallen in love with Firepaw. That is the only wrong I can see," I respond quietly.

Ravenfeather nods. "I believe her. I can see no other wrong she has done."

The spirit-cats look at each other before coming to an impasse, and Graydapple looks back at me. "You will have no punishment," she mews, "but you will have no reward. However, we will allow you to go to StarClan. Your goods outweigh your wrongs."

She turns to Icekit, who pads up next to me. She faces the wall, and chants, "Hikari no ton'neru wa, Spottedleaf ni michi o yuzuru."

I can only understand my name, Spottedleaf, in all of this.

The wall next to me collapses, and I see a hole of bright light before me. This must be the way to StarClan.

I'm about to leave, when I prove myself too curious. "Council?"

All nine heads turn to me. I go on. "May I ask you some questions?"

"Yes, you may," Silvernight mews.

"How did you die? And why are you here?"

There's a moment of hesitation before Graydapple responds. Bitterness laces her mew. "I was caught in a border skirmish. A blow hit my neck, and I died. The second time, a Dark Forest cat snuck into StarClan and killed me."

"For a second time?" I interrupt, confused. "You died twice?"

"Yes. We are the cats whom have died a second time," Emberwing answers. "First time I was struck by lightning. Second time I fell off a tree and snapped my neck."

"I drowned," Silvernight murmurs. "Then I was killed in a play-fight when the other cat accidentally struck me with unsheathed claws."

Ravenfeather doesn't say anything, and Brindlepelt takes his place. "I was burned alive in a forest fire. In StarClan, I drowned in quicksand."

I wince. Those are the worst deaths I could ever imagine.

"Badger attack, then curiosity," Tigerember mews, eyes closed. "I went to the Dark Forest and I was killed there."

"I was killed by a clanmate," Hawkflame meows quietly. "I went to the Dark Forest, where another cat killed me."

"Greencough," Lightningpaw whispers. "Then I drowned."

"My mother killed me," Icekit says. "She told me I was a curse. In StarClan, my father said the same thing, and killed me."

Ravenfeather suddenly appears in front of me. "I'll take you to StarClan," he says gruffly, and I follow him through the tunnel.

"Why are you so sad?" I ask. "You have so much power, able to do so much?"

"It is a punishment," he mews quietly. "We are the cats that have done something so wrong, we are punished."

"How is power a punishment?" I ask, bewildered.

Ravenfeather stops, and whirls around. His green eyes are blazing. "We are the Council!" he hisses. "We decide who did right, and who did wrong. We force every cat to relive their life, and choose their path for them. Do you know how many cats have begged for mercy when we sent them to the Dark Light? Do you know how many have gone insane, seeing their lives flash in front of them? We are forced to force the cats through them, giving them their worst punishments, and we live forever. We cannot die. And we cannot forget. Every waking second, we serve our duty to Fate, Destiny, and Life."

His speech is so angry that I realize my mistake. "I am sorry," I whisper. "I did not realize."

"Most cats don't." He flicks his tail up ahead. "That's StarClan. Go." He begins to disappear, but I call desperately after him.

"Wait! Please tell me! How did you die and come here?"

He disappears, but not before I catch his almost-silent words.

"I loved once. Then I loved again."