Talk:Foxleap and Ivypool/@comment-24143898-20141109033319

Not bad so far! :) I am watching this page.

The only issue I spotted was to do with grammar. For example, in this sentence, you said:

"Fox-dung?- Foxleap! Your from ThunderClan right?" I cocked his head at the tom.

In that sentence, you're meant to say you're instead of your.

So like this:

"Fox-dung?- Foxleap! You're from ThunderClan right?" I cocked his head at the tom.

Please don't be angry - I'm only trying to improve your story :)

But I love it so far!!! Keep up the awesome work!! :D <333