Shards And Fragments/One

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𝔦𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔬𝔭𝔢𝔫 𝔭𝔩𝔞𝔦𝔫𝔰

𝔩𝔦𝔢𝔰 𝔱𝔯𝔲𝔢 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔣𝔞𝔩𝔰𝔢

𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔞 𝔪𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔤𝔢

𝔱𝔬 𝑘𝔢𝔢𝔭 𝔣𝔯𝔬𝔪 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔣𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔤

𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔢𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔩 𝔣𝔩𝔬𝔴𝔢𝔯



Astra stretched and yawned as she rose from her mossy nest. Ah. The chestnut tabby reared back and released a gigantic yawn. She had nearly no sleep last night, hunting until setting-moon, and now (she checked), it was sun-high. Astra knew she wouldn't be in too much trouble considering the work she and her cadre had done, but it was a common necessity to be up by now. Hopefully convincing her cadre to take the mid-sun training session would make up for it. That was said to be the most difficult course of the day and she had only done it once before.

The chestnut she-cat whirled around and noticed most of her cadre was gone, save for her kithood friend, Alabaster, who was softly snoring in his cozy nest near the back of the den. She contemplated waking him up, then decided against it. It would be no use considering he insisted to track down a rabbit last night which resulted in him staying out almost an entire hour more than the others. Poor guy, Astra thought before she sat down in front of the entrance, and began grooming her fur and picking out the moss-scraps of the last sleep's tossing and turning.

The Wind Guild's cats were busy, on the go, as Astra suspected. Most of the cadres were already out for the day or discussing plans together. Astra could hear shouts from outside, and assumed the dregs had gotten into some sort of trouble. Wasn't it enough that they were forced to sleep out in the cold for a full moon, Astra thought. So why would they make it worse by stirring up trouble? The aristocrats (cadre in first placement) were the only ones stopping for a conversation, which of course, was with Wind Guild's leader, Delta, whose brave gray-brown fur flew out behind her back, like a long mane. The silver triangle on her forehead crinkled as her face became worried. Astra wondered whatever worries the lead aristocrat, Phylomena was meowing about.

Astra wasn't concerned. Whatever threat came, Delta usually saw to it, with either verbal or physical force. The worst that could happen was a fight which all the cadres were prepared for - even the dregs. And since training to earn credits for your cadre was necessary, it was all on the better side. After grooming and slicking back her fur, Astra rose and padded over to her cadre's leader, Cyril, who she had known all of their kithood, to their training days, to the dreadful moment when they were placed in the same cadre. He was a brutal, muscular, cold tom who probably had no idea what a social life was. He didn't talk to anyone and he was mostly seen fighting ferociously on the battlefield or sitting in camp, alert and also doing basically nothing. "It was his upbringing," Astra's mother would say. "his parents were work all, no play cats. No fun in life, think of that!" Astra, at first, didn't believe it. No play? How could her mother still be speaking of a cat. But her skeptics faded away as she began training with him, learning that he only spoke when spoke to and never broke his calm exterior, unless he was in battle where he was a furious, mad, outraged beast. No cat had the courage to woo him, no cat had the bravery to become his friend, and even trainers were hesitant to converse with him, unless they were complimenting his innate skills. After being put in the same cadre, Astra was forced to converse with him although he never said much and neither did she. So she left it at that...until he became leader (no surprise, he was always the best) and then everyone was forced to talk to him and endure the awkwardness like Astra was trying to do now.

Cyril's icy-blue gaze fell on her as she approached, and he stood taller, towering over her. "Yes?" He spoke curtly and Astra resisted gulping.

"I was wondering what the plans were for today?" she began, hoping she could pull through a conversation with the most startling tom of the forest without fainting.

Cyril looked away. "I haven't chosen yet." his eyes came back to her, with a new sheen. "Any suggestions?"

Astra swallowed. That was easier than I thought. "I was thinking we could go for the mid-sun battle training," she meowed coyly, then added hastily. "You know, to make up for most of us sleeping in."

The dark gray tom nodded slowly, his gaze never leaving her. "I'll think about it," he meowed, before turning his gaze to where Delta stood, now staring after Phylomena and her cadre as they strolled away. Astra released the breath she'd been holding so long before turning and spotting Alabaster stepping out of their den. Astra rushed over to see if he needed help and the silver tom blinked. "Morning, Astra." He meowed quietly.

"You good, Alabaster? Or do I need to ask Delta to give you a few more hours?" The light brown she cat said jokingly, but Alabaster didn't seem to think so.

"Was I that long?" He blinked, alarmed.

Astra shook her head, surprised he hadn't noticed how bright the sun was already. "Well, I just got up a few minutes before," she meowed hastily, noticing the unconvinced look on his face.

"Oh really," he narrowed his eyes, fixing them on her groomed, shining pelt. "Sure doesn't look like it."

"I'm fast, okay!" Astra snapped, her fur ruffling. Why did toms have to be so self-conscious.

To her surprise, Alabaster laughed. "Calm down, silly," he meowed as her fur gradually lay flat. "I'm just worried I'll be traded at this rate." His voice quieted down to a serious tone.

"Surely not!" Astra snapped, though she was also having her doubts too. Alabaster was clearly the failing one, out of all five of them. "You caught that rabbit yesterday, didn't you?"

"And you caught that squirrel family and Gemina and Cyril brought down that deer kit." Alabaster returned to the tone Astra was not particularly fond off.

Astra opened her mouth, but her reassuring words weren't there this time.

Alabaster dropped his expecting gaze. "Leave it," and the chestnut-furred cat could swear she saw a glaze of tears.

"I won't," Astra shoved him. "the end of the moon is a near-quarter away. You won't be at risk if you...um, if you..." She trailed off, not wanting to imply he wasn't hardworking, because he was!

"It's okay," Alabaster said, then louder and clear. "Astra, you're not the only one." He nodded towards two cats, in their cadre, their piercing gazes fixed on him and his friend. They had seen everything.

"Oh, Al..." Astra began, but he waved her off with a paw, seeming to be deliberately avoiding his parents' gaze. "Look, I know your parents are hard on you but-"

She was cut off by hissing. "Don't call that thing my mother!"

Astra sighed. "I know they are hard on you-"

"-and hate my sorry tail-"

"-and criticize you quite oft-"

"-criticize every mouse-dunged thing I do or say-"

"Enough!" Astra snapped. "Who cares what they think or say?" She lowered her voice to a pleading tone. "Isn't it important that we're in the same cadre? And that we stay that way?"

Alabaster was silent, his head bowed. Then he looked up at her with his turquoise gaze. "You're right," he purred. "it's all worth it if we can still hunt together."

Astra returned his smile, the glaring sun projecting her happiness on her fur.



Cyril had taken up her request, much to Astra's glee. The only setback was today was the trainee's day, giving her cadre the awkwardness of being led by cats moons younger than them. The cadre had not been too happy with Astra when they recalled Cyril calling this Astra's plan. Worse, they were the only adult cats.

Astra wasn't too fazed by her teammate's hostility. Really, it was their fault if they allowed their pride to consume their popularity in the Guild. Because in the moor, twelve cadres competed for the title of aristocrats every fullmoon and any setback could cause one - or worst - all of them to be demoted to dregs. Blame Astra for preventing that inconvenience, why didn't they?

The chestnut-furred she-cat sat boldly next to Cyril, in front of their teammates, where they all sat a few fox-lengths away from the trainees. Her broad shoulders relaxed and her back straight. She listened raptly to the trainer - Crofton's - instructions for the routine, though she would occasionally turn around to see if any of her fellow members would change their minds about the whole situation to no avail. Gemina's scorching amber gaze seemed to always be boring into her fur, Lysette seemed to be listening but when she turned, their similar emerald eyes would meet, and the latter's narrowed, and even sweet Alabaster looked terribly offended. Lastly, she turned to Cyril who returned her gaze quickly and placidly, as if she actually hadn't dragged him into something so revolting.

She actually respected him for that.

"Kaelea, Zachariah, would you two be so kind to demonstrate for us?" Crofton meowed, waving his bushy tortoiseshell tail at two young trainees.

The trainees could not have been more than seven moons and looked strangely alike, with the same mackerel tabby stripes and a sandy coat. Perhaps they are littermates, thought Astra. They stood across from each other as the other trainees backed away. One lashed out and the other hooked the former's paw, knocking them off balance (it was hard to tell who was who). The trainees burst in whoops and amused yowls as the fallen cat reared up and struck the fiend's belly with a sheathed claw and the latter let out a fake yowl and collapsed to the ground, and their littermate fell on top of them, the both rolling in the grass with glee.

"Okay - very funny!" Crofton stuttered, drowned out by the cheers and giggles from the other ten trainees. Astra turned, and saw her whole cadre giggling, Alabaster rolling on the ground to mimic the trainee's move, and she smiled; it wasn't too long before she too began snickering. Between her chortles, Astra turned to look at the stony, tall Cyril and realized his muzzle was curved in an amused way and his fur was slightly shaking. The chestnut she-cat's jaw dropped slightly, and he noticed, abruptly bringing his businesslike demeanor back. Astra scolded herself, wishing to see the serious leader smile again.

Because it was beautiful, she forced herself not to think.

Zachariah and Kaelea stood up, and shied away from Crofton's disdainful look. "That silly-play will get you struck down immediately on the battlefield!" Spit flew from the tortoiseshell's muzzle and Astra politely refrained from gagging. "Why don't the big kits come help us instead - the first two, please."

Astra blinked and realized she was "the first two". She immensely regretted her serious, positive façade as she remembered a breath later that Cyril was beside her. The chestnut-furred cat took a deep breath and started forward before she realized Cyril was already ahead of her, practically running to the front. Cursing him under her breath for making her look like a snail, Astra hurried to catch up with him.

"Now this couple will demonstrate what the proper paw-twist-feint-hold is," Crofton spoke through his teeth.

Even though she knew it was not what it sounded like, Astra couldn't help but feel a tug of embarrassment which became a hard pull on her stomach when she heard a trainee go, "Ooooh!"

Astra sighed, and pretended it was all floating away as she looked up and met Cyril's icy gaze, focused on her and her every move. She nodded curtly at him, preferably not wanting to be tossed down hard by her muscular, beefy cadre leader, though now she speculated how she would manage it. He came at her. His paw was lifted, ready to strike her fatally and she raised her own paw, ready to twist it...

He missed. Or she missed. Astra really couldn't tell. All she knew was she was on the cold, dewy grass a millisecond later. She immediately realized what happened. Silence. Then, "Stunning! Bravo! See what you can learn from experienced cats. This, my pupils, is true battle strategy! Turn the predator into the prey! The bully into the victim! Turning the trees!" But Astra wasn't listening to any of it. She was moreover into the fact that her head was searing with hot flashes, and all she could think of was how nice it would be to go on a swim. Suddenly, she felt her head in the sky. Black. Light. Black. Light.

"What's wrong? Why are you blinking so much?!" Cyril snapped, then he blinked, almost apologetically. He ducked his head. "Sorry. I meant..are you okay?"

Astra was engrossed in the fact that the detached tom who had spoken barely a sentence to her in the eight moons they'd known each other was 1) talking like a normal cat being 2) holding her up with his shoulder.

Cyril blinked, his cold eyes soft with worry. "Astra?" Softer than the petal wind.

Astra felt too woozy to answer him. All she could think of at the moment was how she was leaping forth to knock him and his paw down when he swerved the other way, his paw connecting with her neck...and the headache she got from hitting the ground with a thud. She blinked, coming to, and realizing she was an inch away from his ice-blue eyes, sharpened with worry and impatience.

"Awesome, pal!" A tabby tom held a paw and Cyril slapped it, looking mildly confused.

"I want to be just like you when I grow up!" squeaked a tiny seven-mooner, seeming to be Kaelea from earlier.

Soon, all trainees crowded Cyril, gibbering compliments and soon, Lysette, Alabaster, and Gemina pushed their way in, beaming that they were now the cool, experienced cats and the young trainees were blessed to be receiving wisdom from them. Soon, Astra felt herself being pushes farther and farther away from Cyril until one trainee scooted to get a better view and she toppled over, as a cat from behind caught her scruff and hoisted her into sitting position.

"Wonder how a clumsy cat like you's in that tom's cadre," Crofton then pushed past her to join the crowd.

"Wait," she cried, pushing her way into the crowd, but it was too late. Cyril was back to his stiff, brooding self. The one who got showered in compliments, the one who didn't seem to care at all. But now Astra realized something - he did. She had opened him and he was concealed once more. She tried again, "My teammate!"

No one paid attention to her.

Astra sighed and sat back glumly, wondering how long it would take the trainee's to come past their awe.

Around seven minutes, actually. She guessed it would've been longer had Crofton had not urged them to train again to be more like their new role model. Everyone listened this time, no more amused snickers. Astra craned her head around for Cyril and spotted him speaking to Gemina back in his cold exterior. The chestnut she-cat had a strange fighting urge for a chance to run to him and answer his question.

And then she remembered that she hardly knew him in these moons.

This was the first time she saw what was inside.

He probably would've done the same for any weak, puny cat.

"Want to partner up?" Alabaster had come to her side.

Astra jumped; she hadn't been listening. "Yes, of course!"

But she couldn't let go of new feeling, watching Cyril and a trainee nearly his size train: the feeling of a falling, like the new-leaf rose petals did now. What was once full was shattered, and she didn't think she'd ever see it again.