Talk:The Story of Icewrath, Featherswirl, and Craneheart/@comment-1839575-20130320001545

Um... I think that while the love triangle could be potentially interesting, it gets a bit complicated with five possible mates for Featherkit... and everyone loving her makes her into a bit of a Mary Sue character, quite frankly. Maybe try reducing the love pentagon down to a triangle again. Also the entire story taking place in their kithood is a bit awkward. Kits just aren't supposed to think like that - I think it might be better if most of this story took place after their apprentice ceremony. Um... yeah. Your characters all seem to not have any flaws, I think.

But it's a great start! And nice to write about the cats from your username.