Talk:What Hurts The Most ~ Avalanchepaw's Loss/@comment-5488450-20130326160032

I think for the amount of length you put into this songfic; you did quite a good job. I believe that the beginning was a little too fast and confusing; I didn’t entirely get what was going on during the battle-I just knew there were cats, and enemy, and a lot of blanking out. The fast pace continued through the two deaths and Avalanchepaw’s becoming of a medicine cat but I think you did a good job eventually catching up with the pace. I personally don’t feel that was a good enough reason for Avalanchepaw to leave Stormpaw-but I like the struggle he went through to make that choice, and how later at the end he doesn’t care about her other mate. While I feel as if you could have added more detail and length; to enrichen the story, you did a great job with the key purpose of a songfic which is to draw a comparison between a story and a song. So I finally decided on a 6.5 :)