Talk:Fallen Faith/@comment-44489924-20200212062750

Okay, I think you've written enough for me to (try) give you a (go at a) constructive comment! Yay?


 * SPOILERS*

Prologue

I quite enjoyed reading this, it was very well written. I love how Sandspring is acting, and hope he continues to appear in the fic.

There were a few moments when a capital that should have been there wasn't, and a space that should have been there was absent, but fixing that would be my only tip, tbh.

I wonder who the parent's of Dawnleaf's kits are? I also want to ask where all the rest of the Clan cats have gone? Surely they aren't all dead? It seems Sandspring and Dawnleaf are the only warriors. I know Moonpaw will make an appearance, but still...

Chapter One- Sparrow

I also loved this chapter, and can't wait to see more character development from Sparrow. There were also a few missed capitalizations, and spaces in this, but hardly anything in the grand scheme of things.

I want to ask about Sparrow, Jay and Raven's names... if their mother was a Clan cat, why didn't she name them Sparrowkit, Jaykit and Ravenkit? What made her name them as if they were loners, or rouges? I love this so far, and I cannot wait for more!