Talk:Beautiful (Fanfic)/@comment-7410018-20141103161447

Spoilers~

Wow. Lots of drama.

I really liked the idea of the story, and I thought Midnightpaw was a really cool charrie. She seems really strong and interesting. The story moved at a really good pace for the most part, but sometimes I felt that it sped up or slowed down a few times and it didn't really add to the story.

Some of the characters seemed to overreact too and be really dramatic, and not in the way that shows their character. Tigerpaw's "love" of Midnightpaw didn't really make sense either, it would make more sense if he only pretended to like Midnightpaw in public around Petalpaw instead of confessing to her alone.

I thought those bits where Petalpaw takes Midnightpaw in were really interesting, and it teaches a solid lesson about being loyal to your real friends and not trying to change yourself. I enjoyed reading those parts.

And the ending, wow. I saw it coming, but that wasn't a bad thing just because it built up the anticipation for the moment where it's revealed that Coral was really alive.

So over all this was a really cool story, and I could tell how you enjoyed writing it.