Talk:Rise of the Sun/@comment-26980659-20170305142653

This is a good way to make us feel pity for Brightmist.

For Fox: I don't know if you want to do this, but I usaully don't put a coma after dialogue. If you want to say, 'she said', then just put a coma after it.

For Flame: You should improve on spelling and punctuation. Or maybe something caused the typos. But, you should put more punctuation.

For Pumpkin: You should make the chapters a little longer, but other then that, this story is really good! :)

It got me hooked and captured my attention.