Talk:Goldenfeather/@comment-24155647-20140413120913

This is very, very fast-paced. Romance stories seem more realistic when presented in the way that the two characters are slowly falling in love. It would've added in more detail if you explained how Silverstream brought Feathertail back to life.

And second, writing style. What makes the writing stronger is descriptive language, and I don't get a feel on what it's like down there at the Gathering. How would you describe the place? Bright with the shining moonbeams illuminating the ground? Glossy-leaved bushes sprouting up here and there?

I would, however, like to see a sequel. How will they adapt as loners? Will they give birth? I'm honestly curious to find out. Sorry if my criticism is too much to handle, this is overall an honest opinion on the story.