Dysfunction Junction

'''A/N: This is based on a Clan I came up with for one of my fanfictions. As I wrote out basic sketches for the cats' personalities, it became increasingly clear that every cat has some sort of trauma or psychological damage. This only exaggerates it a bit :P'''

Bloodclaw stood pacing outside Graystar's den, plotting his revenge.

"Soon, very soon, I shall kill that pitiful deputy Gorseheart and from there it shall be but a few steps away to leadership! MUAHAHAHAHA!" He then cursed himself for monologuing so loudly- loudly enough to wake his mate, Hawkflight.

"No, not Gorseheart! Uh, I mean, sure! Go ahead! It'll be awesome!"

"Yeah, won't it? Think of it- the glory, the power, all there for us!"

"Yeah, glory and all that great stuff..." said Hawkflight, heading back inside.

"Ooh, ooh, can we help?!" asked Lizardpaw and Berrypaw, popping out from behind a trashcan.

"No, you're too young," said Bloodclaw gruffly. Berrypaw sulked, but Lizardpaw practically exploded.

"I KEEL YOU! I KEEL YOU ALL!!" he shouted. He stalked off, presumably to form some murderous plot, while a distorted drum machine beat came from nowhere.

The apprentice was heard muttering "This world rejects me...", but they couldn't hear the rest.

"Where in the world did we go wrong?" Lizardpaw's mother Rowanberry asked herself, shaking her head. "Gorseheart and I tried our best..."

"Well, sometimes kits turn out that way," said Hawkflight. "Bloodclawforinstance," she coughed.

To be continued