Talk:The Shining Star/@comment-7060975-20150218214531

I like it so far! Seems like a promising, strong start to a story. --SPOILERS Perhaps you can carry out the kit's tour a bit longer, describing what they feel to be out of the den for the first time, what they see, smell, etc., before coming in with the "Lakeclan attack line." Just a few thoughts :)

Other than that, I love it! Keep going! :D