Talk:We Can't Stay/@comment-8754209-20141107140101

Enjoyed this enormously!

Spoilers!

I've got to admit, I love the names, I might steal Smokewhisp someday for rp c;

Had a few mistakes - I know how  in touvh you are- Tentitavly - just minor things.

And I shipped SmokeXShine before it was cool. I've got to admit, it was kinda cliche, but still got my heart racing. And Gorsethorn was so convincing-I had it in me he was good. Yanno. And I love how realistic it is, but still fiction.

Goosethorn's personality-so thought out, detailed. Although, Smoke just appeared. Kablam. And really, a little bit more of friends between them would have been great. And another thing-a lot of the lines were dramatic. I liked that, but tone it down, perhaps?

And now-Frogkit's death. I felt it was incredibly unneeded, honestly, and a little cliche. Maybe something different would have been better-and why exactly did Stormshine kill Redwing? Surely to protect, but indeed, a fight would be good enough.

Still, loved it!

17/20