Talk:New Day/@comment-17759525-20150823201954

(competition post)

SPOILERS

I love the introduction here; it’s almost hilarious how much the main character seems to scorn her Clanmates’ behavior. I also think it’s interesting that Breezepaw has a cat like Daisypaw for a best friend… normally, cats like that wouldn’t mix well, but it looks like Breezepaw doesn’t have a whole lot of options XD

Their conversation is pretty funny, though; I like how you have cat characters wearing flowers behind their ears, of all things. (How would they stay put, though…?) But anyways, despite herself, Breezepaw seems to honestly enjoy Daisypaw’s company. Interesting.

“Then I ran for my life.” Wow. This line doesn’t match the mood of the story thus far at all. Intentional, I presume…? (Unless I’m just reading into it wrong and it just means that Breezepaw is running away from Daisypaw…)

The repetition of Breezepaw’s insult – “Old coot(s)” – just makes this whole thing seem even funnier. She really doesn’t like her Clan, does she…? I do like her personality, though, and the lighthearted tone that this story has so far. (I’ll probably refer to Vale as a whole as a “story” rather than a “series” or a “show”, for reasons unbeknownst even to me. It just feels right.)

Wait, she’s an orphan? :O Maybe that’s why she seems so different from all of the other cats around her…

(Gosh, this is a long episode.)

“Perfection is fragile, Breezepaw.” Foreshadowing much?

This first piece of Breezepaw’s story is really relaxed, welcoming and comfortable. I love your descriptions; I love the way you introduce your characters; I love the setting; I love Breezepaw; I love everything about this story :3

END SPOILERS