Talk:Fate/@comment-5342796-20130915121824

>SPOILERS<

Whoa, this is awesome! It's just so interesting, and the different perspective puts a new twist on everything, though, as Ginger said, it could be a little confusing at times. Still, I enjoyed it very much. Moonkit and Sunkit are just so freaking interesting! They're certainly not the classic pair-o'-sisters type main characters. I love Moonkit's independence, and how Sunkit tends to be more clingy and worrisome. At first it kinda confused me that they were both so adamant about loving Thornkit, since they were just kits themselves, but then I saw your note about how they're narrating it as elders, and then it all made sense.

The plot is quite interesting; I enjoyed the part at the beginning with the prophecy and everything. I also love the idea for the marks in their fur; maybe you could mention those a couple more times, just in regular routine, to remind us that they're there? They are quite special, after all.

I was a little confused on why Moonkit just almost died too... maybe a little build up to that would be good? You know, to clarify, mention her getting colder and colder, and maybe coughing or something. Idk, you did mention it a couple times, so maybe it's just me.

Also, the dream at the end was a nice addition. And I have to say, I adore the chapter title thingies. They're adorbs ;)

Overall, AWESOME job

