User blog:Zaffie/Under Bridges We Lurk (Like Trolls Of Yore)

OK. WHO IS READY FOR THIS? Me! I am! Get on with it!

So, after a resounding sixteen votes to 'yes' on me starting a new collab (and one 'no' vote... screw you too, Stareh xD) I am ready to try again! But first. Rules.

'''These are the rules. You can tell that they are important because they are in bold. And also italics. ''AND EVEN CAPS. SO PAY ATTENTION.'

Rule 1: If you join this collab, there is to be no whining. No scallywagging, no irritating whinging, and no dawdling. By which I mean; my word is law. Absolute unadulterated law. Think of me as Arti, only less forgiving.

Rule 2: You have one week to write your chapter from the time when I give you the plot. That is it. Understand? I'm gonna say it again, with more emphasis. 'ONE. WEEK.' No ifs, ands, or buts. Zaffie, who is in charge, will give you extension time if she sees fit, but the deal is one week to write the chapter. Got it? Do NOT join this collab if you can't hack it.

Rule 3: NO BLOODY QUITTING. Did everybody understand that, or should I say it louder? If you join this collab, you CAN NOT QUIT. No 'oh I'm sorry but I just don't have time.' Factor that in before you join. No 'oh we're moving house and I won't have internet access.' If you're not up to scratch on family moving time, ask your parents. "Hey, mum, dad, are we going to move house any time in the next six months? No? Cool, thanks guys." No 'oops, sorry, I left the wiki, heh heh.' If you think you're planning to leave the wiki, don't join the collab. If you feel like spontaneously leaving the wiki, wait until the collab is done. Got it?

Rule 4: Now, taking into account rule 3, I will politely be giving you a chance to leave. But only between books. If I format these collabs the same as my others (which I intend to) each person will have two chapters. Two measly chapters, guys, that's... not a lot. Once you have written your two chapters, sure! Quit if you must! Just be prepared for me to hate on you.

Rule 5: Write well. Don't screw up your grammar and spelling, because then I have to go in and fix it. If you're not sure about how to spell something, Google it. "If you're not sure whether the comma goes before or after the quotation marks," said Billy, "ask another member of the wiki." Poor grammar and spelling pisses me off, and I will be policing the most recent work of anyone who asks to join to see if they're writing is up to scratch. So make sure it is. (Did anyone catch that I used 'they're' instead of 'their''? I hope so)

Right. I think five rules is enough for simple minds, yes? Oops, did I just insult a bunch of people by calling them simple? LOL no. I would never do that, would I? Pfft. Of course I wouldn't.

So, now that we've got this sorted, who is ready for the COLLAB?! YAY! *throws hands up in air* Now, here's what you need to know. The collab takes place in the Warriors future. WindClan, unfortunately, all died. (Ok some of them survived and joined other Clans, but that was a long time ago). ThunderClan, ShadowClan and RiverClan remain. BUT THERE IS AN ENEMY. Who... will not be revealed until the collab is written. :D AND THERE ARE TRAITORS. Who... will not be revealed to anyone. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha my plan is foolproof! With tools like these, I cannot fail to take over the wiki! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha haaa... oh, did I say that out loud? Plotting to destroy the world one wiki at a time? Who, me? Perish the thought!

Things I Need To Know About Your Cat: Their name. Their gender. Their description. What Clan they are in. A rough approximation of their age (give it in moons if they're a kit, otherwise just be general, like 'new warrior. old apprentice' etc). Their personality (make it as detailed as possible, or I will be pissed. dig deep into the depths of your creative mind). Please no fursonas, guys. I love your fursonas, but I've already used a bunch of them in my stories and collabs, and, particularly if you're one of the older users, it's not going to feel unique.

For this, I will have nine users, including myself. This should work neatly into three cats per Clan, so if you see a lot of comments below with the Clan you wanted to choose, try picking a new Clan. If I really love a particular cat, I may ask the user to change the Clan so that they fit in. This is not a first-come-first-served situation - I will be picking and choosing users based on their writing skills, the appeal of their character, how well I think we can work together (anyone who complained about me, don't even bother asking), and whether or not I trust them to stick to the collab for two chapters without quitting. I will alert users once they have been chosen both here and on their talk page. Isn't this exciting? Yes :D

There will be a Waiting List, as usual in my collabs. I'm not going to put anyone on it, because I can't just assume that's what you guys would want, so you have to ask. Even if you post here and then are not chosen, you still have to ask if you feel like being on the Waiting List. The list is first-come-first-served, so I will stick you up there in order of askitude and then the first person on the list will replace whoever I need to replace (hopefully no one. but I'm a realist so probably at least two quitters).

Yay guys! Let the competition for Zaffie's affections begin! Just kidding. I'm not gonna kiss the winner. Sorry if you were looking forward to it. :( Now you have a new collab to look forward to instead!

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Zaffie