Talk:Inside The Mind/@comment-5342796-20130915225136

>SPOILERS<

Dammit, I could've SWORN I commented on this... did it not load again? I'm really too tired to write another really long one, but I shall try my best to remember what I wrote!

The concept of this story is excellent! I find it really nice the way you started right off with a dilemma, hooking our attention right away. Maplefernn is quite an interesting character, and the kits are so cute! <3

I do reccomend being a little more descriptive, so we can envision things better, and maybe clarifying a bit on some of the bigger, more sudden events. Otherwise, awesome job! You really should work on this more Tangle XD

